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How to go Low n’ Slow with Mr. Gobbles.

It is now less than a month from the Official Day of Eating Too Much Turkey (ODETMT for short), so it was decided that a Turkey shall be offered to the gods of the ‘cue. That and turkeys are on sale for $0.47/LB ’round these parts. This sounded like a pretty good idea.

First, this came as a frozen ball o’ ice, ready to shatter a toe with twelve pounds o’ solid at the soonest opportunity. This was overcome with a giant stockpot, a bunch of piping hot water, and a tasty brine of half sea salt and half molasses. I have been a big fan of brines in the past, although I try to keep them focused on poultry and occasionally a pork shoulder. I am getting downright cocky with briskets, and am preparing to take one down without foil, and just salt and pepper – but that’s a story for another day…

Back to the bird… The next morning, the bird (henceforth to be known as Mr. Gobbles) was injected with half butter and half apple cider vinegar, with a little bit of the ol’ Pork Rub dumped in there. All the leftover injection was poured in the “cavity” of the bird, because why not? Next, the plumped up Mr. Gobbles was rubbed down with the magic Pork Rub V2.01, which has a sweet heat, with a little twang on the end.

By this time, the pit was fired up with care, with hopes that some form of meat would soon be there – and, as luck would have it, Mr. Gobbles was ready! The bird was placed in a deep pan, and loosely draped in foil. He went on the pit for a nice nap at 235 F, with a tasty apple wood smoke.

All was going to plan – until it was time to remove the foil and pan after six hours. Mr. Gobbles was starting to fall apart at this point, but the skin need about an hour to crisp up. The pit was restoked, and the bird set back on… Then Shiznit went South.

During this process, the door opened (or I didn’t close it – prefer the door magically opening option), which allowed a boatload of oxygen (I believe that is the scientific unit of air measure) into the pit. The temperature then decided to spike to around 600+F. Fortunately, I caught this after about fifteen minutes. Unfortunately, the skin was definitely crisp. And black. And scorched.

While the skin was a loss, the meat was still very tender, with great flavor from the brine, injection, and rub. For the most part, Mr. Gobbles was a relative success (minus the part of the attempted incineration). Since his relatives are dirt cheap, another attempt at bird may happen soon, with a few nifty tweaks…

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